This is a spur of the moment post. Suddenly Mummy G just wants to tell you I love you and thank you (really!) for surviving and coming into the world and growing so well, lighting up my otherwise pretty dark life (for now).
I probably have never told you what a miraculous child you are to have been born into this world by me. This is because, by right, Mummy G should not be able to bear any child in my womb. Unlike most women, where bearing children is really the next step after getting married, having #2 after #1 or #3 after #2, Mummy G has a "sleeping" womb. It is complicated to explain at this point but let's just say that I have a sleeping womb.
You were conceived with the help of medication (and the help of dearest Dr Fong). Before you start to think why would that be so miraculous, it is because the same medication that was given to me to help conceive you does not work anymore. Meaning, Mummy G's womb has gone back to sleep after delivering you and now in a coma.
Words cannot describe how I really feel at this moment.
To be really honest, yes I am sad. Very sad. I might never be able to give you a brother or sister and you might never be able to have an opportunity to know how it is to have a sibling. But this situation has also made me realize how precious you are and now I wonder how difficult it could have been for you to try to fight for your survival in a womb unsuitable to house babies.
I will always remember how you fought for your survival during the first trimester with Mummy G not producing any progesterone and you triumphed. I will also always remember how you had to live with the dreadful amniotic band in the womb which could have caused you to be deformed and you triumphed. So, before anyone will ever tell you otherwise, lil' Tyann, you ARE the most special and determined fighter I have ever seen!
The spate of events that happened to me after I had you: a) losing my job because I was staying away from work too often when you had to stay home due to frequent coughs and colds and not able to go to the infantcare; b) the current situation of the "sleeping" womb- made me realize how much of life's benefits I was taking for granted all these while.
What a privilege it would be to be to just be able to work. What a privilege it would be to be able to have children- both of which I am unable to achieve at this moment.
However, in times like this when I think too much, I steer my thoughts towards you and I think-What a privilege it is for me to have a child like you.
